score:2
The answer comes in the Rhinoceros Sutta (mentioned by @santa100):
If you gain a mature companion,
a fellow traveler, right-living & wise,
overcoming all dangers
go with him, gratified, mindful.If you don't gain a mature companion,
a fellow traveler, right-living & wise,
wander alone
like a king renouncing his kingdom,
like the elephant in the Matanga wilds, his herd.We praise companionship β yes!
Those on a par, or better,
should be chosen as friends.
If they're not to be found,
living faultlessly,
wander alone
like a rhinocerosAvoid the evil companion
disregarding the goal,
intent on the out-of-tune way.
Don't take as a friend
someone heedless & hankering.
wander alone
like a rhinoceros.Consort with one who is learned,
who maintains the Dhamma,
a great & quick-witted friend.
Knowing the meanings,
subdue your perplexity,
[then] wander alone
like a rhinoceros.
Upvote:2
The Buddha said he teaches about suffering & freedom from suffering. Drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, women with broken capacity for fidelity, etc, are suffering and to be avoided; for financial reasons and for reasons of mental & physical health.
Upvote:3
Following this Sutta will leave you lonely. How do you navigate this problem?
It's actually quite a relief to be free of those who are scoundrels, drunkards, addicts, frauds, swindlers, and thugs. And I am always surprised and grateful at how many others are left in the world to meet and greet in passing or again as friends.
Ultimately, when one becomes a good friend, loneliness ends.
π
Upvote:5
The truth of the Buddha's teaching is timeless and doesn't get affected by modern norms or customs. Imagine if it's influenced by social norms, then there'll be a possible scenario in a distant future where human virtures and values becoming severely degenerated. It'll be common practice and acceptable social norm for humans to do all kinds of evil and little to none of virtuous conducts. If going by the standard of that future time, the Buddha's teaching will be perceived as completely irrelevant, or at least only deemed valuable to a very very small number of people. The Dhamma drum will have so many pegs that it won't be able to make audible sound. So for the OP question, you'd have a better chance of finding a friend or a soulmate with similar mentality or conducts if s/he also cultivates similar virtues. Finding fellow Buddhist practitioners would be best, but any other sincere followers of other world religions would also be fine since they pretty much share similar codes of conduct. If all else fail, then it's perfectly ok to walk the path alone like a proud Rhinoceros