Is it cruel that God punishes us with eternal hell?

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to have a second chance after death

There isn't any biblical support that anyone gets a second chance.
(Does any denomination say that individuals will be given a second chance?)

it seems like he doesn't care if we suffer after death, right?

There isn't any biblical support for God's not caring.
Nor is there any support for anything other than possibly brief suffering after death.

1 Titus 2:3 says "who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth".
That sounds like he does care.

why did he create us … if he meant for us to have free will?

God wants his children to freely choose to follow his way.
He created mankind to be his loving family, not his mindless slaves.

The key to understanding is to realize that in this current age:

  • God allows Satan to remain as the god of this world.

    • "the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not" — 2 Corinthians 4:4
    • "Now is the judgment of this world: now shall the prince of this world be cast out." — John 12:31

  • God is not trying to save mankind now.

    • If he was, we'd have to conclude that for 2000 years he's been doing a very poor job of it, which doesn't make sense for the omnipotent being that was capable of creating the entire universe.

  • Only a small number of elect will be offered salvation at this time.

    • "And except that the Lord had shortened those days, no flesh should be saved: but for the elect's sake, whom he hath chosen, he hath shortened the days." — Mark 13:20
    • "For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall shew signs and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, even the elect." — Mark 13:22
    • "And then shall he send his angels, and shall gather together his elect from the four winds, from the uttermost part of the earth to the uttermost part of heaven." — Mark 13:27
    • "Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom." — Luke 12:32

  • The vast majority of mankind was not only not offered salvation, they never even heard of the possibility.

    • Consider the billions of people that lived and died before Jesus appeared, and the even more billions that right up until recently had no chance of ever hearing Jesus's message.

  • Just as the nation of Israel was chosen to be a physical example (of both good and bad) to the world, spiritual Israel (true Christians) are chosen to be a spiritual example to the world, not to convert it.

    • "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." — matthew 5:16
    • "In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you." — Titus 2–7,8
    • "be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity." — 1 Timothy 4:12
    • "Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world." — 1 Peter 2:12 (NLT)

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