Any authentic sutta from any tradition that gives guidance on what kind of partner to choose?
score:20
Here's a summary of Chapter 5 of The Buddha's Teachings to Laypeople: Practical Advice for Prosperity and Lasting Happiness.
- If you fail to find suitable associates it's better to be "like a solitary rhinoceros"
- Leave aside unproven traditional criteria: including race, caste, gender, and external appearance (and creed)
- A person's inner development is more important than their birth
Be cautious of first impressions and initial understandings
People cannot be know well by their appearance
Nor can they be trusted after brief impression.
Yes, the undisciplined may roam in the world
In the attire of the well displined.Associate with a person, observe and evaluate their words and actions
- Be wise and rational in order to obtain a clear picture of the person you're evaluating
- Find wise people who cause no fear or worry
Look for someone who is compatible in four ways:
- Similar confidence in spiritual development
- Similar respect for self-discipline
- Similar respect for humanistic practices
- Similar level of wisdom
These similarities are "so important for a peaceful marriage".
Spiritual development: if one person respects spiritual believes and practices, and the other holds them in total disregard, then the two people are simply incompatible.
Self-discipline: if one partner is well-disciplined and the other unscrupulous then their incompatibility will become obvious and cause problems.
Humanistic practices: includes dana, also caga (generous acts).
Level of wisdom: i.e. samapanna, includes knowledge, skill, emotional maturity, reasoning power; doesn't mean that both should have same education and intellectual ability, but wide difference in these areas could cause incompatibility and lead to conflicts.
Chapter 6 is about how to treat your partner after you marry.
Upvote:6
There is some guidance from the Sigalovada Sutta on the responsibilities of the husband and wife. So, by extension, a suitable partner is one who can fulfil these responsibilities.
"In five ways should a wife as the western direction be respected by a husband: by honoring, not disrespecting, being faithful, sharing authority, and by giving gifts.
"And, the wife so respected reciprocates with compassion in five ways: by being well-organized, being kindly disposed to the in-laws and household workers, being faithful, looking after the household goods, and being skillful and diligent in all duties.
More post
- 📝 What's the effect of living on alms (social services) and not doing duties, being unrestrained?
- 📝 Why the aristocrat is best of people?
- 📝 Do all Buddhist schools give dharma names upon ordination?
- 📝 Transfering merits
- 📝 Is rebirth scientifically proven?
- 📝 Is exposing immoral behavior divisive speech?
- 📝 What did the Buddha say about gratitude?
- 📝 Is eating fish eggs the same as killing?
- 📝 Should mantras always be sung in Tibetan/Pali/... or may I sing them in my native language?
- 📝 What does it mean by perfect morality?
- 📝 What is the Buddhist interpretation of the flow state?
- 📝 Why does "not existing from its own side" make something a "conceptual construction"?
- 📝 Can you gain stream entry by focusing on the clinging and stress going on at the five clinging aggregates?
- 📝 Is owning a restaurant considered wrong livelihood?
- 📝 How To Keep Loving Without Reward?
- 📝 What is the Tibetan prayer recited by the Dali Lama at the beginning of his 1989 Nobel Prize acceptance speech?
- 📝 What is the difference between Suttas and Sutras?
- 📝 How many hours of Meditation in single sitting during Vipassana?
- 📝 Did the Buddha Meditate?
- 📝 How close is English to Pali?
- 📝 Living worried about the future and reaching mindfulness
- 📝 problems with meditation in the morning
- 📝 Afterlife in Buddhism and Hinduism
- 📝 About two qualities of the Dhamma
- 📝 Important literature on Zen Buddhism before the year 1900
- 📝 Does evolution contradict Buddhism?
- 📝 Practice of the other three Brahmaviharas
- 📝 Buddhist Equivalent to Prayopavesa (resolving to die through fasting)
- 📝 Finding a Meditation Teacher
- 📝 Is reiki harmful or not (is it harmful to advancing in the path)?
Source: stackoverflow.com
Search Posts
Related post
- 📝 Any authentic sutta from any tradition that gives guidance on what kind of partner to choose?
- 📝 What is the equivalent scientific term for samsedaja? What kind of beings on earth are born from samsedaja?
- 📝 What is known about enlightenment before the lifetime of the Buddha? Are there any claims that he was the first?
- 📝 If you Consolidate the Satipatthana Instruction from the Tripitaka what would the additions and variation in Comparison to Maha Satipatthana Sutta
- 📝 What is the meaning of "Nothing new will be said here, nor have I any skill in composition. Therefore I do not imagine that I can benefit others."
- 📝 What is it that pass from this life to the next?
- 📝 Has any Buddhist meditator claimed that the mano-vijnana has a base to differentiate it from the other consciousnesses?
- 📝 What can one do with knowings that occur from strong intuition?
- 📝 I believe I have done bad things in a past life can I fix my curse that causes people to turn against me what kind of Karma is this?
- 📝 Can there be an action free from the taint of desire? If there can be, what is the nature of that action?
- 📝 What is the sutta where the Buddha says that one breath or one bite of food is the proper timeframe with which to contemplate life/death?
- 📝 Is there a Buddhist school / tradition wich recognizes the endless cycle of rebirth but doesn't teach that we should get liberated from it?
- 📝 What exactly differentiates Vipassana from Samatha meditation?
- 📝 What are the texts that contain words which can be attributed directly to the Buddha?
- 📝 Loneliness: Rhinoceros-Horn Sutta from a Lay person's perspective
- 📝 What is it that is re-incarnated ?
- 📝 What does it mean to 'advert' to the factors of jhana after emerging from jhana?
- 📝 What does Buddhism literature and tradition say about transgender folks?
- 📝 Any benefit from meditation, if your mind is already completely blank?
- 📝 Is there any extreme of physical pain that a fully enlightened person would find unpleasant on any level?
- 📝 Is there any point in learning meditation from an unenlightened person?
- 📝 In the Anapanasati Sutta what is meant by 'sensitive to rapture/bliss'?
- 📝 Is there any mention of child adoption in any Buddhist writings and what is the view on child adoption with regard to Buddhism?
- 📝 Is there any benefit in abstaining from listening songs?
- 📝 Are there formal mechanisms in any Buddhist institutions that explicitly reconcile Buddhist principles with science?
- 📝 What are any and all of the exceptions to eating after noon if you've taken 8 precepts?
- 📝 What kind of mistakes can a new meditator in his/her early 20's avoid?
- 📝 What kind of harm can koan answers cause to one's practice?
- 📝 From a Buddhist point of view, what are the benefits of supernormal powers?
- 📝 When do I realize that I am free from rebirth?