Resolving right action & intention in a white lie

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There are 4 conditions which need to be met for something being classified as a lie:

8. Fourth Precept: Abstention from False Speech

FIVE PRECEPTS (PACASILA)

So if you are mentioning the white lie with the intention to deceive then it is false speech.

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How do you know they aren't strong enough to handle truth? You feel you can handle it so why can't they? Not telling someone something because you feel they can't deal with it seems like you're the one who is having the hard time. So where is the truth. "A white lie" is a way of saying I feel shameful because if I explained this to them they wouldn't understand or except this may make you look bad but the thing is that doesn't matter- because that is not you. Just ego. Harm, ignorance and understanding are difficult things. But pain is essential to the Nobel truths. People can careful remove thorns they find but a person who is unaware will find truth there is truth. Personally follow the eightfold. Many parents softn truth to try to protect their children. But when a child finds out for themselves they might choose to see that parent as unreliable or as a lier a betrayal and or shame can result. It's ok to not know what to do. It's far better then lying because there's less chance to judge it wrong or lie to yourself. Meditation should be used to determine what your deeply feeling and why. If you're too invested it's because the attachment is unnatural and you'll probably do the wrong thing either way. Don't worry too much about the lie or truth because things are temporary. If you understand that on a very deep level then telling the truth is easier.

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